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“IF MY DOG DOESN’T LIKE YOU, I DON’T LIKE YOU.”
“DOG HAIR IS A CONDIMENT IN OUR KITCHEN.”
“IF YOU’RE TALKING BEHIND MY BACK YOU’RE IN A REAL GOOD POSITION TO KISS MY ASS!”
“CRAZY CAT LADY STARTER SET”
“AGREE TO DISAGREE IS WHERE YOU BOTH JUST DECIDE THE OTHER PERSON IS AN ASSHOLE.”
“WARNING! SIDE EFFECTS INCLUDE WEIGHT GAIN, DEPRESSION, AND LOSS OF SEX DRIVE. ASK YOUR DOCTOR IF MARRIAGE IS RIGHT FOR YOU.”
“DRINK COFFEE DO STUPID THINGS FASTER WITH MORE ENERGY.”
“COFFEE! IF YOU’RE NOT SHAKING, YOU NEED ANOTHER CUP.”
“BEER WILL CHANGE THE WORLD! I DON’T KNOW HOW, BUT IT WILL.”
“EAT A SQUARE MEAL A DAY A BOX OF CHOCOLATES.”
“I’M NOT REALLY A BITCH I JUST PLAY ONE IN YOUR LIFE.”