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“SOMETIMES I SAY STUPID STUFF LIKE “I DO””
“WINE DOESN’T MAKE YOU FAT. IT MAKES YOU LEAN…AGAINST TABLES, CHAIRS, WALLS, AND UGLY PEOPLE”
“WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS. ADD VODKA”
“THE BEST THERAPIST HAS FUR AND FOUR LEGS”
“THE FIRST RULE OF PARENTING: NEVER NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS”
