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“IT’S BEEN LOVELY BUT I HAVE TO SCREAM NOW”
“IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN”
“EVERY DAY I GIVE MY FAMILY TWO CHOICES FOR DINNER TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT”
“A CLEAN HOUSE IS A SIGN OF A WASTED LIFE”
“IF IT FITS IN TOASTER, I CAN COOK IT”
“I DON’T HAVE HOT FLASHES. I HAVE SHORT, PRIVATE VACATIONS IN THE TROPICS”
“IF ANYONE TELLS YOU IT’S TOO EARLY TO DRINK WINE… UNFRIEND THEM.”
“PART OF ME SAYS ‘I CAN’T KEEP DRINKING LIKE THIS’, THE OTHER PART SAYS ‘DON’T LISTEN TO HER SHE’S DRUNK’.”
“WE HAD TO GIVE THE CHILDREN AWAY, THE DOG WAS ALLERGIC.”
